BLAH!

I am just plain tired all the time! I am tired of the boys constant fighting about NOTHING, I am tired of having to fix things that the dog messes up in the back yard, I am tired of being without a husband (not just physically), I am tired of living at Point Mugu away from civilization, to get anything that isn't overpriced or frickin' SUBWAY you have to drive a minimum of 8 miles, and I am tired of being pregnant already. I have found that swimming helps with the aching hips, for a little while at least, it is a definate bonus to have discovered that one and I totally wouldn't have if it wasn't for Jen Maldonado my friend here, cuz I NEVER would have gotten in the pool. I keep thinking that if I am only half way through this pregnancy that things are only going to get worse...my hips are causing me pain that can not be explained, and every time I call the doctors office of course they say "only tylenol" tylenol doesn't do jack for pain, really...are pregnant women supposed to be in agony all the way through pregnancy and then have it increase with delivery and then afterward suffer more because of the demands of life and the children you already have and the child you just had? Wow...yea, I am on a little bit of a tangeant here...but this is what is on my mind right now. I feel so crappy sometimes that all I want to do is just sit around and do NOTHING, and when I say nothing I mean, the house is in complete dissaray, the kids run around in nothing but their underwear...I MEAN NOT A DAMN THING! I can definately say that there is a depression in play here because of how dramatically life changed when RJ left, and how dramatic a life change it was to even just come back to battalion...military life is most certainly not a glamorous one, and if there are people out there who thing it is glamarous...I ask them to give it a try and find out for themselves that it most certainly is NOT. If we go away from the house for an extended period of time, we all start to feel good and play and have fun and then we have to come back to this place to deal with the dog, the mess and then there is something in these walls or in the air out here at Mugu that is making us all be congested and feel like CRAP for the first little while in the day. I wish that this was more than just a bitch fest here, but...this is what a blog is for isn't it? To get things off you mind and off your chest even if it isn't always positive. BLAH, anyhow, I am sure that my kids are thinking, my mom sucks...so...I gotta do something

March 30, 2010

The title is one of the hardest days I had in a long time! It is the day RJ left on deployment for the first time in over 7 years...it was very difficult. I do wish that there was a way to avoid having to go through such things, but being a military family, it is one of the things that you go through because it is your duty and also because you know that the price does not outweigh the purpose of what he is doing...doesn't mean it doesn't SUCK! Anyway, on to something else shall we...

I am 19 weeks and 6 days pregnant, I can feel the baby move quite a bit and...oh yes, I didn't know when we were due when I last blogged...we are due Nov. 2, but there will be a c section a week prior to that, the possibility of me still being in the hospital for Bryen's birthday is extremely HIGH! I am hoping that we can do the surgery on the 22nd of Oct, but that is up to the doc I am seeing where I get the ultra sounds done. We are...having another boy, at least that is what was said when I had an ultra sound on June 1st. I am going back for another on June 29th, I guess the reason I have all of these ultra sounds isn't anything beyond what they do normally so...whatever..hehe!

Life is quite different having two kids, a dog and being pregnant with your husband deployed...quite different from having 1 child that isn't 2 yet...that is what it was the last time we did a deployment. I'm gonna go now, but I will blog more later